Wednesday, 14 December 2011

Time to Heal

These last few months of mine have been so hectic. A whirlwind of new experiences and so much to tell about. One thing I must divulge my love life. The most interesting thing that has happened to me in these last few months.

I met a wonderful man last year around this time. A heart broken man. Someone who needed healing. A friend. Who knew that a year of hanging out and we would date. Although time was never on our side of this relationship, we were both curious to see how this would all turn out. To be quite honest, nothing about this relationship going in was....conventional. How we met was through some mutual friends and foolish partying. Bad mistakes and drunken nights brought us closer. No we never slept together. We were supportively there for one another. We were both two people in need of some company...and that is how we found each other. We were two very hopeless people.

We didn't date normally either. Our first date was because our friend didn't make it due to an unexpected labor from a family member. Our first kiss was him kissing me in a club to throw off a girl (jeez). We just never did anything right from the start and that could very well be the reason why it will never work. My fairytale was never a fairytale to begin with. How was it supposed to end? We dated knowing that we had an expiration date. How? He was moving to Australia. Why? To discover life....

Now I am one to understand life. I understand we all have dreams and we all need to fulfill them whatever way we can. Why we do things and why we must do them in a certain way is all a mystery to me. Life itself is a very unexpected thing. As much as we plan, things never go the way we expect them to. I never knew I would date a man who was very well going to move away from me. Let alone...find out that he still had feelings for his ex girlfriend. Yes. Life is very unexpected.

I think what has really hit me was...I never cared for him as much before. When I realized I would be away from him, I did miss him. I guess my friends, my unconventional fairytale ends here. As I poured my heart out and let him know how I felt (which I stupidly...stupidly regret), I realized...I really suck at love. Yeah in a few days time I will get better...and each day passing will get better. So, what do I have to do? Just take this time to heal...for now. I never know what life will bring me next, but bring it. That's what I have to say.

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